Your name is PEENKY PAHYIE.
You are one of the few non-purple bloods to pledge your services to not only HER IMPERIOUS CONDESCENSION, but also to the GRAND HIGHBLOOD of THE HOLY MOTHERFUCKING ORDER OF THE SUBJUGGLATORS. But since you are a seadweller, yours is not the calling of the LAUGHSASSINS. Which you are thankful for, because those guys are really boring and grumpy and generally NO FUN TO BE AROUND! No, your sea dweller ass serves as an ALCHESELTZERMIST, tasked with brewing the WICKED ELIXIR known as FAYGO. The dangers are SURPRISINGLY MANY. The lucky ones breathe in the fumes too long, find themselves with the PURPLE-IN-PURPLE EYES of Faygo addiction, and get mercy sacrificed before the otherwise inevitable SLOW AND HORRIBLE DEATH FROM WITHDRAWAL. The unlucky ones… well, thats why you never leave your respiteblock without your ROCKET LAUNCHER.
The only thing that gives you greater joy than blowing apart the FORMLESS GROTESQUERIES that arise from the syrup pits is to make your friends happy. You are normally a PERMANENTLY ERUPTING VOLCANO OF GIGGLES, but as with many highbloods you are prone to SUDDEN VIOLENT MOOD SWINGS. Fortunately for the large number of people youve infected with THAT TROLL DISEASE CALLED FRIENDSHIP, your mood swings tend to be towards PARANOIA AND CRUSHING DESPAIR instead of the more typical UNCONTROLLABLE FURY.
Your trolltag is festivityInquisitor and :D< you are just so HA:P:PY! and EXC:ITED! that even yo^u^r q^u^irk c:ant hel:p b^u^t SMILE! :)
What will you do?